"[Roker] just needs to learn how to blame George Bush" -- Scott Ott
 

"A spokesman for Islamic Jihad, the global terror group, said he hopes the rebranding campaign succeeds, so that CAIR can also work to change misconceptions about beheading" -- Scott Ott

"The sale came just before President Obama's capital gains tax hikes kick in, saving Gore millions of dollars, which he said he'll use to make his in-ground, heated swimming pool more polar-bear friendly" -- Scott Ott

"A federal appeals court yesterday refused to shield retailer Hobby Lobby from the ObamaCare mandate to provide morning-after abortion-inducing drugs to employees of the Christian-owned firm" -- Scott Ott
 

"And finally today a programming note: The end of the world is scheduled for this coming Friday, the 21st, according to the ancient Mayan calendar" -- Scott Ott
 

"House Speaker John Boehner Friday offered to delay a debt ceiling debate and to jack up taxes on the wealthy in an effort to avoid the fiscal cliff" -- Scott Ott
 

"Senator John McCain said Rice's decision clears the way for the president to appoint a person of integrity...On the other hand, McCain said, Obama could simply pick Senator John Kerry" -- Scott Ott
 

"President Obama said despite North Korea's burgeoning space program, NASA still leads the world in Muslim outreach" -- Scott Ott
 

"Obama said he hopes those numbers keep growing, because no one wants go back to the bad old days of privately purchased food that got us into this mess in the first place" -- Scott Ott
 

"DeMint said Heritage will hire several new policy analysts, including Rihanna, Ke$ha, Pink and Nicki Minaj" -- Scott Ott